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27 November 2003 @ 11:01 am
Life  
Life almost recovered from being blown up. Possibilities on the horizon.

Internet access next Tuesday - need to get HD fixed, or at least limping along enough to work when cable guy shows up.

Holidays are tough alone.

I get to go see the Phillips collection tomorrow - am really looking forward to it.

Why is it that I seem to be tougher than others? Because I am? Because I have to be? Random thoughts. Was told I was living an ascetic life lately - seems true.

Need to work on needing even less emotionally. I chose this route, I need to live with it and stop bothering others. It only causes problems for them. I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself.

-the redhead-
...back home to unpack some more...
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Your Origami Brothertimwerld on November 28th, 2003 05:12 am (UTC)
Just see how tough!
By the way, since I've been reading you regularly lately I added you.

Why do you seem tougher than others? Probably because you have to be. It's the way you're built. You realize that, when faced with adversity, you have a choice. To fold up in a fetal ball and wait for a rescue that might not be coming, or to put a game face on and plod through it.

But even stoicism only gets you so far. Especially if it becomes habit, because it leads to emotional exclusion. And though emotions can be painful, they can also be joyful. I would be willing to bet that your friendships are far more durable than you believe, and that you're bothering people far less than you think you are.

Of course, what do I know.
Wolfteddywolf on November 30th, 2003 02:56 pm (UTC)
Need to work on needing even less emotionally. I chose this route, I need to live with it and stop bothering others. It only causes problems for them. I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself.

Being able to take care of yourself doesn't mean that you can replace a friendly crowd or a lover with just a thought. You're human and wired to socialize some. It's not a want, it's a need.
I know you can take care of keeping yourself alive, no questions there. But, it's OK to spend time with people and yes, even lean on friends when you have trouble. Friends, you see, will help when they are able and be sorry they can't when unable.

Just some food for thought.