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30 July 2003 @ 11:36 pm
*sigh*  
It was a day. The kind of day that you just want to make it through.

Work - yesterday I volunteered to do a project at work during the rather unproductive meeting in which the highlight was people keeping their tempers. I offered to do it because we had the beginnings of a rapidly escalating mexican standoff going on. No big deal, it wouldn't be that hard (just time consuming), would show that I'm a 'team player', would make people feel cared for (read more important), and would end the enmity and get it done. Boss was not at the meeting. I planned to do it this afternoon. I *told* them I would start on it this afternoon at the meeting. This morning T**** saw that this situation was not to her liking, threw a big fit, sent out a very passive aggressive email to *everyone*, whinged at the boss, whinged at the staff meeting, and played the martyr by volunteering to come in early tomorrow morning and do it herself. I wonder why I even bother to open my mouth at that place some days. Most days, really.

Bed - got sidetracked by something that I thought, at the time, was more important. Didn't get it finished.

Home - got to listen to my roommate have loud sex with the new little girl he's dating. I'm happy for him, but there is a limit. Maybe he could have warned me she was coming over. At least then I could have planned on making myself scare or somesuch.

Exercise - seems I strained something in the back of my left knee walking today. I suppose that's what I get for walk-racing T**** up that last big hill. Been sitting here with an ice bag. Took some Advil and Vioxx, doesn't seem to be helping. Tried sleeping, that's not working. Am debating real pain pills.

Life - have tried to be a friend to someone over the last couple of weeks. Very hard. Steadfastly. It's not working. And apparently it's my fault. I don't understand the communications I've received, I don't properly see that the things I do make no sense from their point of view, my boundaries are unreasonable, and I'm the Ice Princess again. *nod* My words on the subject do not matter. Why is it so hard to move relationships to a different level? A different scenario? Time to put all of that in it's box. I can tell when I'm being driven off.

I feel the silence descending. Just keep to myself - it's safer.

I wonder if it would help to start sleeping on the couch again?

Have to be to work early tomorrow to assist the martyr...

-the redhead-
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Non calor sed umor est qui nobis incommodat.melanie on July 31st, 2003 11:56 am (UTC)
you're too sweet to be feeling this sad. :*(
-the redhead-theredhead on August 1st, 2003 07:44 am (UTC)
Thank you sweety *smile*

It happens, life goes on *shrug*

-the redhead-
Counterfeit Reality: handgun kittytangibleatrophy on August 1st, 2003 01:11 pm (UTC)
i find it interesting that you have a male for a roommate. don't hear of that too terribly often, but i too have to endure the ongoings of another bedroom when my roommate has his g/f over. personally; i just crank the stereo...

&... Ice Princess?

sounds like something/someone must have hurt you deeply @ some point in time to make such a reference. no need to explain... i'm not trying to pry.