It took 45 minutes and 13 seconds to accomplish that seemingly simple task.
First there was the phone tree. Because it's vitally important to find the *one* person at Dell who could help me based upon the product I bought, the type of company I work for, the size of the company, what products we sell, where the company is located...Zzzzzzzzz
Once I got done with the phone tree interrogation they happily sent me to -- India! Yeah! I was a winner!
I spoke with an extremely polite young man who's name I couldn't spell or pronounce if you paid me. What was my name? Would I spell that please? Did I have my order number? His accent wasn't too heavy, but he was careful to speak clearly and use simpler terms. Which is a good thing because he pulled out his little script and we then got to play 20 questions. What product did I want to return, what type of company do I work for, what size is the company, what products we sell...Zzzzzzzzz
Then the question I came to dread – May I place you on hold for 2 to 3 minutes while I pull up your order? Okay… How long can it take to pull up my order? *yawn* They have crappy hold music.
Once he came back we moved on to the thick of it. Why do I want to return the PCIE card? (Because it’s the wrong part) How did I get the wrong part? (You sent it to me) How did I get that part number? (From your technical support tech). May I place you on hold for 2 to 3 minutes while I input this information? Sure, I said thinking that we were just about done. *works on a report*
By this time I’m beginning to believe that I got the new guy, who is getting instruction from his trainer.
Thank you very much for holding ma’am. I’ve entered your return. I will have UPS pick it up tomorrow. I’m very sorry ma’am, my computer is having problems so I do not have your tracking number yet. May I place you on hold for only 2 – 3 minutes… *helps two people who come into my office with questions*
I was put on hold 5 times during this conversation before the return was resolved. Did I mention their hold music sucks?
Great – finally done. It should be a simple matter to order the new part, right? *laughs*
Of course, the person who issued my return couldn’t *possibly* place my order for the correct PCI card. Nooooo, I must speak with small business sales. May I place you on hold for 2 – 3 minutes while I direct you to the correct sales associate? *considers playing in traffic*
Finally I was connected with a young man who’s name I can pronounce. Chad. Who let me know before we started he had just a couple of questions for me to make sure I was speaking to the correct division. What type of company do I work for, what size is the company, what products do we sell...Zzzzzzzzz
That’s 45 minutes and 13 seconds of my life I will never get back.
And I'm grumpy because I got home too late to go to spinning.
The big question is did I break my foot?