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17 April 2003 @ 01:11 pm
I don't like drama. Drama caused for no good reason other than attention seeking. And blaming. Or perhaps pointing fingers to remove responsibility from one's self is also accurate. Seems counterproductive, even if it is human nature. Pain is no fun. Wanting to lash out is natural. But there are limits. One must be conscious of collateral damage.

But then again I've never been one of those cute, helpless little girls for whom others drop everything and rush over to fix the world either. I guess the one is not workable without the other.

Not that I'm not guilty of being upset but the result usually it takes the form of a direct ass kicking, not petty public gossiping and shit disturbing (which are not the same things as asking questions and trying to figure out what one did wrong, even if phrased badly).

Firestorms are only bearable if you are the one who created them. And even then they aren't very fun.

Yeah, I was stupid, on many levels. And yes I was thoughtless. Not that apologizing is really going to do much good. And not like I didn't already apologize anyways.

I need to learn to use my words better. To avoid any touch of emotion with my writing. Be more subtle. More cryptic in certain venues. Or just suck it up and don't ask questions.

I need to remember that people may know who I am even in places where I don't think that they do. Not like that hasn't come up in other venues. I hate to have to lock everything up here, but that seems best for now.

So, it's time. The question is - time for what?

-the redhead-
Tags: ,
Musings from the CZ unitcz_unit on April 17th, 2003 09:07 pm (UTC)
Time to move on.

Time to rest.

Time to look to tomorrow and see what it will bring.