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27 July 2003 @ 07:26 pm
Input wanted - Was I not being friendly and polite??  
Had this convo today. Was trying very hard to be friendly and polite and such.

Was it wrong or unreasonable to express my preference?!? Was I rude about it? I even said 'thanks'.

There are days when I shouldn't even bother opening my bloody mouth...

-the redhead-

[15:46] theredhead: so I take it from your earlier message you arrived safely
[15:46] theredhead: hopefully your luggage did as well
[15:46] ******: mmmmhm.
[15:46] ******: right now I am lying naked in the hot tub in my room
[15:46] ******: very very relaxing after a busy day
[15:47] theredhead: have a lovely time :)
[15:47] theredhead: I didn't really need to know the naked part - thanks
[15:48] theredhead: glad yiu are enjoying yourself
[15:48] theredhead: have a nice evening
[15:49] ******: why? It's true.
[15:49] ******: ok, I'm wearing my suit in the hot tub
[15:49] ******: after a day in the sun it is very tranquil.
[15:50] ******: need to get it dry cleaned anyway
[15:50] theredhead: yes, lots of things are true
[15:50] theredhead: doesn;t mean they are necessarily appropriate
[15:50] theredhead: I'm glad yu are having a lovely time
[15:50] theredhead: :)
[15:50] ******: *snort*
[15:51] ******: anyway, what's up with the lyrics and such on your journal?
[15:51] theredhead: so, what did you do today besides the plane trip?
[15:51] theredhead: hopefully fun stuff
[15:51] theredhead: of course, almost anything is more fun than a plane ride
[15:54] theredhead: maybe you will get to go out tonight? That would be fun :)
[15:56] theredhead: lots and lots of fun stuff to do in *********
[15:56] ******: perhaps
[15:57] theredhead: hmmm - I sense that your connection has dropped - oh well
[15:57] theredhead: ah - it hasn;t
[15:57] theredhead: well thats nice that it is working for you :)
[15:57] ******: yep
[15:58] theredhead: :)
[16:01] theredhead: well I do hope you got to do something more entertaining than fly today, and have fun with your fellow ******* or some such tonight
[16:01] theredhead: must be nice to be surrounded by like minded people :)
[16:03] theredhead: hmm - I don't think you are getting my messages, as AIM thinks you keep coming back repeatedly
[16:03] ******: mmmm here
[16:04] ******: naah, just took a shower and now am drying on bed
[16:04] theredhead: ah
[16:05] ******: prolly dropped on the way out
[16:05] ******: anyway
[16:05] theredhead: I didn't really need to know that either - thanks
[16:06] ******: um. i talk like that to friends all the time
[16:06] ******: is this how you talk to friends?
[16:07] theredhead: my friends do not usually tell me they are naked twice in an otherwise nonexistant conversation
[16:07] ******: really?
[16:08] theredhead: yes, really - most people don;t tell random people that
[16:08] theredhead: but that;s fine, I would prefer that you didn't
[16:09] theredhead: anyways, glad you got there safe, hope you have your luggage, hope you are enjoying yourself and have done some fun things already
[16:09] ******: I see. So I am to consider you "random people"
[16:09] ******: got it.
[16:09] theredhead: no, I said that I would prefer that you did not share that with me - thanks
[16:09] ******: No, you said "- most people don;t tell random people that"
[16:10] theredhead: I hope that you get your fill of ************ - I know that it will be enjoyable for you :)
[16:10] ******: Well, if I'm going to get criticized/corrected for every third thing I say then I will simply be quiet.
[16:10] ******: right.
[16:11] theredhead: yanno - it's less than useless for me to try to have a pleasant conversation with you
[16:12] theredhead: I have tried to be friendly and pleasant and ask you about your day
[16:12] ******: I feel the same way. I ask you about your life and get deflected.
[16:12] theredhead: I have also tried to explain my preferences to you
[16:12] ******: I chat with you and you criticize.
[16:12] theredhead: oh - so we are still on the topic yesterday
[16:12] theredhead: I understand now
[16:12] ******: Ah.
[16:13] theredhead: well, I have asked you repeatedly in the conversation about your flight, yiur day, do you have yiur luggage
[16:13] theredhead: and have repeatedly wished you to have a lovely time
[16:13] theredhead: that waqs a question - you are the one who seems stuck on it
[16:13] ******: Yes, but it does seem to be like talking to someone who is not quite you.
[16:14] theredhead: expressing my preference that you not tell me yiu are naked repeatedly is not criticism nor is it unreasonable
[16:14] ******: Not quite. However I have noticed that you hop on people quite quickly.
[16:14] ******: I see.
[16:15] ******: Well, I had a lovely day walking around, saw lots of sights, and now am sitting in my room before the evening.
[16:15] theredhead: tell you what - I will chalk this all up to the fact that you are unfortunately having a bad day
[16:15] theredhead: I hope yiur evening is better than yiur day appears to have been
[16:15] ******: I should and do chalk things up to the same.
[16:15] theredhead: and perhaps we can speak another time when yiu are feeling better
[16:15] ******: Redhead, don't sit here and blame lack of communication on me.
[16:16] ******: Oddly enough, I feel fine.
[16:16] theredhead: no, actually I had a nice day and I was trying to have a nice, friendly conversation with you
[16:16] ******: Bit tired, but fine.
[16:16] theredhead: I tried very very hard
[16:16] ******: Then why wouldn't you say so?
[16:16] theredhead: but apparent;ly to little avail
[16:16] theredhead: you did not ask about my day
[16:16] theredhead: you asked about something else
[16:16] ******: Ah correct. I did.
[16:16] ******: Damn.
[16:16] theredhead: and I refuse to sit here and try to justify that I have been polite and reaosnab;le and friendly
[16:17] ******: You're right. My apology.
[16:17] theredhead: so perhaps we can speak another time when you are in a more congenial mood
[16:17] ******: Then why do I feel otherwise?
[16:17] theredhead: I hope that you evening is better and I wish you well
[16:17] ******: goodbye Redhead. I hope your evening goes well.
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Christopher Scottkorwyn on July 30th, 2003 06:32 am (UTC)
Conversations
Three thoughts:

1) Even with emoticons you have issues with emotional tones in any text based conversation.
2) Your response to the tun comment comes off (in male speak) as sharp.
3) It feel like you took offense very ealry at a comment that could have been innocent (I specify clothed state from time to time in other discussions, for example) from there it kind of falls apart